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From Shadows to Gold: Turning Hidden Pain Into Community
After breaking his back two times while paragliding, Dan Jones found himself in a “dark place”. Used to a life of adventure, adrenaline, and partying, Dan suddenly found himself on a long road to recovery and facing emotional struggles.
“Breaking my back meant stopping all the sports I loved, especially flying, which I was passionate about. I knew instantly that I had to give it up.
“That’s when everything began to fall away underneath me. I fell into quite a dark place because I knew it would take another seven months to recover, and the first time had already taken about a year. Then Covid hit, and I ended up stuck in France in a flat during lockdown.
“I spent six or seven months recovering before coming back to the UK.”
Growing up nestled between the mountains and coastline of North Wales, Dan had a passion for the outdoors: surfing, paragliding and biking.
Taking on a challenge of swimming the English Channel to raise money for an ocean clean-up organisation, Dan says he felt like he was always working to prove himself.
“I went all out and trained incredibly hard — in hindsight, it just compounded the broken back. I think I was still trying to prove myself.
“For years I had my guard up. Anything I did, I went all out. Biking, flying; constantly pushing, constantly getting injured. And within those injuries, oddly, there was validation, it meant I didn’t have to face everything else.”
Dan says that breaking his back the second time forced him to stop.
“When I had to lie still for so long and knew I couldn’t do those sports anymore, things fell apart. I had to face myself — something I’d managed to avoid for years.
“For years I sought embodiment through extreme sports rather than through myself. Losing that was like losing a part of who I believed I was.”
Diving Into The Cold, Finding Your Breath
Eventually, Dan says, he hit breakdown — but soon discovered cold water swimming, meditation, and breathwork.
“Breathwork especially was huge for me. I’d been completely numb for months, emotionally and physically. I’d get up and stand under a hot shower trying to feel something, but nothing came.
“Then I went on a breathwork weekend. I came back a different man. I could feel again. Something shifted and I felt present in my body again.”
“I’d been doing a lot of counselling and it helped to an extent, but breathwork showed me that everything I’d been holding was actually in my body. In my fascia, in my cells.
“Breathwork allowed me to release things I couldn’t even reach through talking. It was far more impactful.”
Dan says that what pushed him to take up the cold water swimming, meditation and breathing was the realisation that he couldn’t keep doing what he was doing.
“What I thought was “me” had been taken away and I didn’t know what filled that void. There was also just desperation, I’d try anything to reconnect with my body, to get out of my head. I was overwhelmed, anxious, and numb.”
Supporting Men Through Community
Dan began to slowly embark on his recovery, and began taking part in facilitator training that two years later led to the creation of Men’s Hut — an online community supporting men with their personal growth.
“I’d spent so many years searching for highs outside myself, and then suddenly I had no choice but to turn inward.
“That’s what led me to breathwork and somatic work. It worked for me, and now I share it with others. I’m not saying it’s for everyone, but it’s a powerful tool.”
The driving force behind Men’s Hut was that Dan didn’t want any man to feel as alone as he had felt, and has made it a mission to ensure that support is accessible to all men — wherever they are in the world.
It’s always the first step that’s the hardest. “I might need this,” or something similar. Sometimes it’s almost nothing. But that small step matters.
“Not everyone has access to an in-person men’s circle, so I wanted to create something online too.”
Beginning with a talking circle once a month, today Men’s Hut supports men online through classes, men’s yoga, breathwork, soundbaths, mobility sessions, along with one-to-one and small groups where we can check in with each other.
“I’d learned how important embodiment is, so I wanted to bring those elements to men: helping them land back in their bodies, reconnect, and feel grounded.
“Some men have been with me for years, and watching their journeys is incredible. When a man keeps stepping in, sharing, and doing the work, he starts seeing his own light — and we celebrate that. Having other men witness you in that way is powerful.”
Shadow Work and the Hero’s Journey
Dan says his journey to recovery has brought about positive changes in his life, noting that for years he tried to change things externally before doing any inner work.
“When a man learns to regulate himself — to ground, breathe, respond instead of react — that changes everything. Breathwork helps, talking helps, and that groundedness carries into their homes, relationships, work.
“They move from the heart more than the head.”
Part of Dan’s work has been exploring his shadows based on the Jungian archetypes of the King, the Magician, the Warrior and the Lover.
“I see how important it is now for men to truly see themselves. That’s the magic of this work.
“Each archetype has a shadow side. A lot of men sit in their shadow Magician, for example: self-doubt, fear, uncertainty, conditioning from childhood.
“Shadow work helps a man identify where he’s stuck, understand those patterns, and move from shadow into his “gold”. And I genuinely believe every man has huge amounts of gold within him.”
The King, Warrior, Magician, and Lover are four Jungian masculine archetypes often used in shadow work. The King embodies leadership and stability; the Warrior represents discipline and action; the Magician symbolizes insight and transformation; and the Lover reflects connection, emotion, and vitality.
Processing anger is a vital part of Dan’s work, who says that he feels men often “carry the weight of the world on their shoulders”, and he is now working with a facilitator who specialises in supporting men to process their anger safely
“As well as creating spaces for men to talk, we also need to create spaces for men to move through their emotions.
“These spaces are essential. If men can process anger and sadness in a held, grounded environment, it doesn’t need to explode outward. It can be worked through in a way that’s contained and healing.”
A regular theme that arises in Men’s Hut groups is how deeply men feel they need this type of work — not just spaces to talk, but spaces to go safely into the body and emotional expression.
“It’s always the first step that’s the hardest, that initial message. Recently I’ve had a few men reach out with just a short text: “I might need this,” or something similar. Sometimes it’s longer, sometimes almost nothing. But that small step matters.
“My advice is: know that support is there. Know that community exists. I had to reach out myself, and I know how incredibly difficult it can feel, but it’s so worth it.”
Expert Board Member
This story is not only a strong example of how injury can trigger a deeper identity reset, it also captures something many men lack: a place to be seen without having to “perform”. Research consistently links social support with lower distress and better mental health, which makes community-building especially relevant for people in difficult life situations.
